影片《消防员》中，在熊熊大火中奋不顾身的烈火英雄卡利波，工作中的座右铭是：“永远不要把同伴抛在后面”。许多次，卡利波为了保护战友都冒着生命的危险。但是，他这句格言却没有应用在妻子的身上。回到家里，与妻子的婚姻处于水深火热中，救火英雄面对自己即将倒塌的婚姻却一筹莫展。只能眼睁睁的看着自己与妻子的关系随着时间慢慢的恶化、疏远。终于，他们夫妻决定了离婚。 

卡利波的父亲知道这个消息后，为帮助儿子的婚姻死灰复燃，父亲给了他一份手写的40天计划，叫为爱情大胆尝试(Love Dare)。在父亲的劝说下，卡利波勉强同意了这个计划。虽然屡遭妻子的拒绝，父亲仍然鼓励他，向他解释：这份爱是上帝赐予我们的礼物……终于，卡利波成功了！你也可以，为什么不试试呢？ 

挑战第一周 

Resolve to say nothing negative about your spouse today. 

今天，请努力，不说有关配偶的坏话 (负面的评价)，是的，一句也不说。

** 相关圣经启示

Eph 4:2 Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.  

以弗所书4：2 凡事谦虚、温柔、忍耐、用爱心互相宽容。

Do at least one unexpected gesture to your spouse as an act of kindness.

至少做一件让配偶意想不到的事情，来表示你对配偶的好意和善心。 

** 相关圣经启示

Eph 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.  

以弗所书4:32 并要以恩慈相待、存怜悯的心、彼此饶恕、正如神在基督里饶恕了你们一样  

Buy your spouse something that says, “I was thinking about you today.” 

给配偶买点东西，来表述心意说：“我今天想着你！”  

** 相关圣经启示

Rom 12:10 Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.  

罗马书12:10爱弟兄、要彼此亲热。恭敬人、要彼此推让 

Contact your spouse sometime during the day and ask how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.  

给配偶打个电话或留个言，问个好，看是否能帮他/她做点什么。

** 相关圣经启示

Gen 2:18 The LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”   

创 世 纪2:18 耶和华神说、那人独居不好、我要为他造一个配偶帮助他。  

Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them.  

询问配偶，让他/她告诉你三件事，三件你让配偶在平时生活中感觉不爽的事情。 请千万留意你不要因此而反击你的配偶。  

** 相关圣经启示

Pro 27:14 If a man loudly blesses his neighbor early in the morning, it will be taken as a curse.  

箴言27:14 清晨起来、大声给朋友祝福的、就算是咒诅他。 

Choose to react to tough circumstances in your marriage in loving ways instead of with irritation.  

请选择用友爱的方式，而不是用怒火来应对婚姻中的礁石。

** 相关圣经启示

Pro 16:32 Better a patient man than a warrior, a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.  

箴言16:32 不轻易发怒的、胜过勇士。治服己心的、强如取城。   

On a sheet of paper, write out positive things about your spouse. At some point during the day, pick a positive attribute from the list and thank your spouse for having the characteristic.

在一页纸上，罗列出配偶的优点。然后，时不时地从中找出一两项，来赞扬和感激配偶的这些优良品质。 

** 相关圣经启示

1Co 13:7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  

歌林多前书13:7 凡事包容、凡事相信、凡事盼望、凡事忍耐。  

挑战第二周 

Share with your spouse how glad you are about a success he or she recently enjoyed.

告诉你的配偶，你为他/她最近引以为豪的成就，感到由衷的快乐和喜悦。 

** 相关圣经启示

Son 8:6 Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame.  

雅歌书8:6 求你将我放在你心上如印记、带在你臂上如戳记。因为爱情如死之坚强，嫉恨如阴间之残忍，所发的电光、是火焰的电光、是耶和华的烈焰。  

Think of a way to greet your spouse today to reflect your love for them, and then do it with a smile and enthusiasm. 

今天，想出一招去问候你的配偶，带着微笑和热情使出此招，来表达对配偶的爱意。

** 相关圣经启示

1Pe 5:14 Greet one another with a kiss of love. Peace to all of you who are in Christ.  

彼得前书5:14 你们要用爱心彼此亲嘴问安。愿平安归与你们凡在基督里的人。  

Do something out of the ordinary today for your spouse. 

今天，为配偶做点非同寻常的事情。 

** 相关圣经启示

Rom 5:8 But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  

罗马书5:8 惟有基督在我们还作罪人的时候为我们死、 神的爱就在此向我们显明了。  

What need does your spouse have that you could meet today?

你的配偶有什么需求正好是你今天可以满足他/她的？ 

** 相关圣经启示

Eph 5:28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.  

以弗所书5:28 丈夫也当照样爱妻子、如同爱自己的身子。爱妻子、便是爱自己了。  

Demonstrate love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse.

为了展示爱情，在你和配偶意见分歧的一个方面，心甘情愿地选择妥协和让步。 

** 相关圣经启示

Php 2:4-5 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. and I will suggest you to continue: Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.  

腓利比书 2:4-5各人不要单顾自己的事、也要顾别人的事。你们当以基督耶稣的心为心。 

Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement and resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.

和配偶协商，共同规划健康友好的条约来解决分歧，在以后的意见不合的时候，努力遵守并执行此条约。

** 相关圣经启示

Mar 3:25 If a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.  

马可福音3:25 若一家自相分争、那家就站立不住。  

Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. 

为了和配偶有更多高质量的相处时间，有意放弃一项你自己通常会做的活动。  

** 相关圣经启示

Ecc 9:9 Enjoy life with your wife, whom you love, all the days of this meaningless life that God has given you under the sun- all your meaningless days. For this is your lot in life and in your toilsome labor under the sun.  

传道书 9:9 在你一生虚空的年日、就是神赐你在日光之下虚空的年日、当同你所爱的妻快活度日。因为那是你一生在日光之下劳碌的事上所得的分。  

挑战第三周 

Choose a way to show honor and respect to your spouse that is above your normal routine. 

选择一途，超越寻常的自我，来表达对配偶的敬意和尊重。

** 相关圣经启示

1Pe 3:7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.  

彼得前书3:7 你们作丈夫的、也要按情理和妻子同住，因他比你软弱、与你一同承受生命之恩的、所以要敬重他，这样便叫你们的祷告没有阻碍。

Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse’s life and in your marriage.  

祈求上帝改良你配偶生命中和你婚姻生活中的三个方面。

** 相关圣经启示

3Jo 1:2 Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.  

约翰三书1:2 亲爱的兄弟阿、我愿你凡事兴盛、身体健壮、正如你的灵魂兴盛一样。  

Determine to guard your mate’s secrets and pray for them.  

下定决心，守护你配偶的秘密，并为之祷告。 

** 相关圣经启示

Pro 17:9 He who covers over an offense promotes love, but whoever repeats the matter separates close friends.  

箴言17:9 遮掩人过的、寻求人爱，屡次挑错的、离间密友。  

Prepare a special dinner at home and focus this time on getting to know your spouse better.  

在家里为配偶准备一顿特别的晚宴，在共进晚餐的浪漫之际，更深更好地了解你的配偶。

** 相关圣经启示

Pro 3:13 Blessed is the man who finds wisdom, the man who gains understanding.  

箴言3:13 得智慧、得聪明的、这人便为有福。  

Ask God to show you where you stand with him, and ask for the strength and grace to settle your eternal destination.  

恳求上帝让你明白你和他的关系，向他祈求力量和恩惠，来安置你永恒的家。  

** 相关圣经启示

1Jo 4:7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.  

约翰一书4:7 亲爱的弟兄阿、我们应当彼此相爱，因为爱是从神来的，凡有爱心的、都是由神而生、并且认识神。 

Dare to take God at his word and trust Jesus Christ for salvation.  

勇于听从上帝的话语，并且相信基督耶稣是救主。  

** 相关圣经启示

Rom 5:6 You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly.  

罗马书5:6因我们还软弱的时候、基督就按所定的日期为罪人死。   

Make time to pray and read your bible today. 

今天，挤出时间向上帝祷告，并阅读圣经。

** 相关圣经启示

Isa 58:11 The LORD will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail.  

以赛 亚 书 58:11 耶和华也必时常引导你、在干旱之地使你心满意足、骨头强壮，你必像浇灌的园子、又像水流不绝的泉源。  

挑战第四周

Choose to be committed to love even if your spouse has lost most of their interest in receiving it. 

选择矢志不渝地忠于执守你对配偶的爱情，纵然对方已经对此意兴阑珊。  

** 相关圣经启示

Hos 2:20 I will betroth you in faithfulness, and you will acknowledge the LORD.  

何西阿书2:20。也以诚实聘你归我、你就必认识我耶和华.

Remove anything that is hindering your relationship, stealing your affections and turning your heart away from your spouse.  

除去所有的”第三者”，这些东西有损健康的夫妻关系，偷窃你对配偶的爱情，夺走你对配偶的爱心。 

** 相关圣经启示

1Co 13:5 It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  

歌林多前书13:5 不作害羞的事，不求自己的益处，不轻易发怒，不计算人的恶。

Identify every object of lust in your life and remove it. 

找出你生命中每一项不良嗜好，并将之抛弃。

** 相关圣经启示

1Jo 2:17 The world and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of God lives forever.  

约翰一书 2:17 这世界、和其上的情欲、都要过去，惟独遵行神旨意的、是永远常存  

If there is anything you haven’t forgiven in your spouse, forgive it today. 

如果还有任何事情你还不曾原谅你的配偶，请在今天原谅他/她。  

** 相关圣经启示

2Co 2:10 If you forgive anyone, I also forgive him. And what I have forgiven–if there was anything to forgive–I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake,  

歌林多后书 2:10 你们赦免谁、我也赦免谁、我若有所赦免的、是在基督面前为你们赦免的。

Ask for God’s forgiveness for your areas of wrongdoing, then humble yourself enough to admit them to your spouse. 

祈求上帝原谅你所做过的错事，然后诚恳谦卑地向你的配偶承认错误。

** 相关圣经启示

Rom 2:1 You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge the other, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things.  

罗马书2:1 你这论断人的、无论你是谁、也无可推诿、你在甚么事上论断人、就在甚么事上定自己的罪，因你这论断人的、自己所行却和别人一样。  

Think of one area where your spouse has told you you’re expecting too much, and tell them you’re sorry for being so hard on them about it. 

想一想，你的配偶曾告诉你，你对他期望值太高之处。请在今天为之道歉，对不起，在此事上难为了配偶。 

** 相关圣经启示

Psa 25:20 Guard my life and rescue me; let me not be put to shame, for I take refuge in you.  

诗篇 25:20 求你保护我的性命、搭救我、使我不至羞愧、因为我投靠你。  

Purpose to do what you can to meet the greatest need in your spouse’s life right now.  

今天，倾心倾力，尽己所能来令你配偶人生中最大的愿望得以实现。

** 相关圣经启示

1Jo 3:16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers.  

约翰一书3:16 主为我们舍命、我们从此就知道何为爱，我们也当为弟兄舍命。  

挑战第五周 

Before you see your spouse again today, pray for them by name and for their needs.  

今天，在再见到配偶之前，专门为他们的需要祈祷。

** 相关圣经启示

Eph 6:7 Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not men.  

以弗所书6:7 甘心事奉、好像服事主、不像服事人。

Ask the Lord to reveal anything in your own heart that is threatening oneness with your spouse and, if appropriate, discuss it openly and seek God for unity.  

祈求上帝向你揭示你内心隐藏的有碍夫妻同心的意念，如果可行，和配偶共商，向上帝寻求同一的心。 

** 相关圣经启示

Joh 17:11 I will remain in the world no longer, but they are still in the world, and I am coming to you. Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name–the name you gave me–so that they may be one as we are one.  

约翰福音 17:11 从今以后、我不在世上、他们却在世上、我往你那里去。圣父阿、求你因你所赐给我的名保守他们、叫他们合而为一像我们一样。 

Commit to God and your spouse to make your marriage the top priority over every other human relationship. 

向上帝和配偶承诺，婚姻是你所有人际关系中的首选项，最为优先项.  

** 相关圣经启示

Gen 2:24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.  

创世纪2:24 因此、人要离开父母、与妻子连合、二人成为一体。   

If at all possible, try to initiate sex with your spouse today(in a way that honors them).  

今天，如果可能，主动献殷勤，向配偶提供尊重体贴的贴身服务。  

** 相关圣经启示

1Co 7:3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.  

歌林多前书 7:3 丈夫当用合宜之分待妻子、妻子待丈夫也要如此。

Tell your spouse that you desire to include them in your upcoming decisions, and that you need their perspective and counsel.

告诉配偶你很想让之参与以后所有事情的决策过程，你需要配偶的观感和劝告。  

** 相关圣经启示

Ecc 4:11 Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone?  

传道书 4:11 再者、二人同睡、就都暖和，一人独睡、怎能暖和呢？ 

Verbally commend your spouse about a recent time when they demonstrated Christian character in a noticeable way.  

口头赞扬配偶，有关最近在他/她身上明显观察到的基督徒的品格。  

** 相关圣经启示

1Co 13:6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  

歌林多前书 13:6 (爱) 不喜欢不义，只喜欢真理。  

Find a Christian marriage mentor. Ask God to direct your decisions and discernment. 

找一位基督徒婚姻辅导员。祈求上帝来指导你们的决定，帮助你们分辩是非。  

** 相关圣经启示

Pro 15:22 Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.  

箴言15:22 不先商议、所谋无效，谋士众多、所谋乃成。  

挑战第六周 (完结篇)  

Commit to reading the bible every day. If your spouse is open to it, see if they will commit to reading with you.

决心每天阅读圣经。如果你的配偶愿意，看看是否两人可以共同阅读。 

** 相关圣经启示

Psa 119:105 Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.  

诗篇 119:105 你的话是我脚前的灯、是我路上的光。 

Ask your spouse if you can begin praying together. 

询问你的配偶是否两人可以开始一同祷告。  

** 相关圣经启示

Mat 18:19 “Again, I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything you ask for, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven.  

马太福音 18:19 我又告诉你们、若是你们中间有两个人在地上、同心合意的求甚么事、我在天上的父、必为他们成全。 

Ask yourself what your spouse would want if it was obtainable, then map out a plan for meeting some (if not all) of their desires. 

问问自己，什么东西是你的配偶渴望得到的，同时又是你能够给予的？然后，制订出可行计划来满足配偶的其中一些(如果不是全部)的愿望。

** 相关圣经启示

Psa 37:4 Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.  

诗篇37:4 又要以耶和华为乐，他就将你心里所求的赐给你。  

Spend time in personal prayer, then write a letter of commitment and resolve to your spouse. Leave it in a place where you mate will find it.  

花点时间为自己的事祷告，然后给配偶写一封信，表达你对婚姻的承诺和决心。把信放在配偶肯定不会错过的地方。

** 相关圣经启示

1Co 13:8 Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.  

歌林多前书 13:8 爱是永不止息。先知讲道之能、终必归于无有，说方言之能、终必停止、知识也终必归于无有。  

Write out a renewal of your vows and place them in your home. 

写出你们结婚誓言的续篇，放于家中，刻在心里。

** 相关圣经启示

Rut 1:16 But Ruth replied, “Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.  

路得记 1:16  

路得说、不要催我回去不跟随你、你往那里去、我也往那里去, 你在哪里住宿、我也在那里住宿, 你的国就是我的国、你的神就是我的神。